July 12 – The Prodigal Suitcase

July 12

At 7:11 am I got a call from a FedEx representative. A lost suitcase agent had located my suitcase! The problem, she explained, was that I had called it a suitcase, rather than a duffel. I didn’t want to argue, but I know that at some point I told the FedEx agent that my luggage was, at the very least, duffel-like. I definitely used the word “oblong” more than once.

Although Merriam-Webster online dictionary doesn’t provide a highly specific definition of either type of luggage, in my mind the fact that it has wheels and a retractable plastic handle makes it a suitcase. And the fact that I explained it had a distinctive ladybug pattern means they should have spotted it IMMEDIATELY.

No matter! Make ready the fatted lamb! Soon I will be reunited with my favorite t-shirt. Here is a picture of me and that shirt hanging out together, changing the world for the better with our combined powers.

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UPDATE Wedneday July 17th: Here it is, looking as conspicuous as ever:

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Next door, the Four Chihuahuas of the Apocalypse congratulated me with their usual snarling hysteria.

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